As a society we are quick to put a label on any person, action or belief. In the few short months that I've been a momma I've learned that this is especially true within the parenting community. So many people, myself included, label themselves as certain types of parents, or follow a certain named parenting style.
When Sophia was first born, I followed my instincts. This included not ever letting her cry, always addressing her needs, sleeping with her, nursing her (as frequently as she wanted!), holding/wearing her most of the time, and cloth diapering. It just made sense to me to do these things. I had never read a parenting book, taken a class, or really spent much time talking with anyone about parenting. I just did what felt right. Not long afterwards, I began to learn what the term "attachment parenting" meant, and quickly grouped myself with people that also labeled themselves as "attachment parents".
Today I was talking with another semi-new momma about sleep. She cosleeps, and mentioned her son seemed restless throughout the night. He was sleeping okay in terms of duration, but it didn't seem like he was getting quality sleep. I told her, without even thinking, that Sophia was very similar until she started sleeping in her crib. She gave me a funny look, pondered what I had just said for a minute, and went on talking about something else so as not to offend me with what she really thought. She was as polite as she could be, and kept her negative thoughts to herself, but it stayed on my mind throughout the day. Was I wrong for having Sophia sleep in a crib? Every baby prefers to sleep with their momma, right? Maybe I didn't give it a fair chance. But as quickly as these thoughts came into my head, they went right back out.
For a few weeks after Sophia was born, she always slept with me. She seemed to love it. But as the newborn sleep-all-the-time stage faded, so did her tolerance for any kind of sleep disruption. She would wake up periodically when she slept with me, and cry for a minute, never really waking up, and go right back to sleep. She did that fairly frequently, and it took me longer than it should have to put two and two together. Sophia liked to be with her momma, but she wasn't getting the kind of quality sleep she needed. I decided to follow her lead and evolve. I began laying her in her crib. Even if it was 4 AM and I was dead tired, I made sure I stayed awake long enough to get her back to her crib after she fell asleep. Lo and behold, she began sleeping longer stretches, and much more soundly. She always woke up happy, and that was the easiest way to judge her quality of sleep. I still miss my little baby that just wanted to sleep with momma, but that little baby showed me that she needed her own space. She sleeps 12 fours straight through the night now, and has since she was less than 8 weeks old. I credit most of that to having her sleeping in her crib, in her own room. She told me she needed space and a very quiet room, and I listened to her.
So does having Sophia sleep in her own crib in her own room make me less of a "crunchy" mom? Because I no longer co-sleep does that mean I can no longer classify myself as someone who practices "attachment parenting"? Maybe, I guarantee if you would have asked the momma I spoke to today, I would have lost some crunchy momma points with her. But what do I think? I think the most important thing we can do is listen to our babies and our children. They have the answers. They know what they need, and they really do try their hardest to communicate it to us. Putting aside everything else, everything we want to be, and listening to what they need from us is the key. I miss sleeping with Sophia. Steve and I have talked about how she would be allowed to sleep in our bed for as long as she wants. But, she doesn't want that. Rather than holding onto a title and being desperate to be seen as a certain type of parent in the eyes of other parents, just do what you feel is right. I believe listening to your baby is true attachment parenting. I understood and respected her needs, and every single human being on this planet deserves that. Follow your heart and be open to everything your babes guide you through, and it'll all turn out way better than any of us could have ever expected.
This whole parenting thing can be hard, but there's no reason it should be. And it won't be, if you just listen.
9.04.2013
5 Months!
Holy crap, how do I already have a five month old? Time sure does fly when you're having fun!
I thought it would be cool to do a monthly blog post documenting things about her every month. I've seen these on blogs for a long time and thought they were a great idea long before Sophia was even a passing thought.
So here we go!
Weight: I'd say 20ish. She was 19 lb 8 oz about 3 weeks ago so she's probably around the 20-21 mark now. She's a big girl! She's was in the 90th percentile when she was born, and has been off the charts ever since!
Height: She was 25.5 inches at the same time I got her weighed, so right around there! She was in the 75th percentile I believe, so pretty tall too!
Sleep: She is an awesome nighttime sleeper. For a good chunk of the last month she was on an awesome schedule. We'd start her nighttime routine around 6:30, and she'd be down for the night by 7:30. She typically slept 12 hour stretches waking up between 7-8 AM. The past week or so she's been staying up until at least 9 every night, and sometimes 10. I'm comfortable with her staying up as late as she wants (within reason), as long as she's happy. Even with going to bed later she is still sleeping roughly 12 hours, although a few times it's only been 10. But that's still awesome! Naps have gotten a lot better too. For awhile, she would only nap on the boob or in a carrier, and on the off chance she stayed asleep when you laid her down, it would only be for MAYBE half an hour. But lately we've been getting two good 1.5 hour naps each day, occasionally even a 3 hour one! I think we owe most of the good nap-taking to her finally finding her thumb. When she does wake up, she usually puts herself right back to sleep!
Clothing Size: 12 months! She still fits in some 9 months stuff, but they're pretty hard to get on and off. I even had her in a size 18 month dress the other day, and it fit!
Diaper Size: She hardly ever wears disposables, but when she does she wears a size 4!
Nicknames: Fia, FiaBear, Pia, PiaPia, Chunk-A-Munk, Babygirl, Monkey, and HoneyBear.
Teething: This hasn't been too rough of a month. She had the sniffles for a few days and I believe that was teething related but otherwise it doesn't seem like too much is going on there.
Milestones: She started rolling from back to tummy this month, and once she figured out she could do it she was a rolling machine. Changing her diaper feels impossible at times because the minute you lay her down she flips on her side to roll over. She also started sitting up unsupported this month. She can sit up on her own for several minutes, if she wants to. If she's tired, forget it. But most of the time she really enjoys it and will sit up playing with her toys for a good little bit. We also introduced solids this month, and she's really enjoying them! She's just starting to really bite and chew and is constantly trying to eat any food we have.
Likes: Food, keys, all her teethers and toys, her jumperoo, her bouncy chair, her Cabbage Patch baby doll, her highchair, daddy, nursing, going out (anywhere!), baths (especially eating the washcloths), and the dogs.
Dislikes: Her car seat, strangers, having her diaper changed, having something taken away from her, loud noises, standing still for too long, having her clothes changed, getting dressed after bath time, and not being able to see momma.
Random Notes: Overall this has been a pretty good month. Learning to play with toys and finding her thumb has IMMENSELY curbed her insatiable need to constantly be moving. She's gotten more content going on car rides, but still doesn't love them by any means. She's started falling asleep in the car lately though, which is awesome, even if she does wake up when we go to get her out. I'll take anything over her being super upset. I've been having so much fun with this little girl lately. I love that I get to hang out with her all day everyday. I still have yet to leave her with anyone other than Steve, but to be honest, there's no reason I NEED to. I know when the time comes, it'll be harder for me than it will be for her.
I thought it would be cool to do a monthly blog post documenting things about her every month. I've seen these on blogs for a long time and thought they were a great idea long before Sophia was even a passing thought.
So here we go!
Weight: I'd say 20ish. She was 19 lb 8 oz about 3 weeks ago so she's probably around the 20-21 mark now. She's a big girl! She's was in the 90th percentile when she was born, and has been off the charts ever since!
Height: She was 25.5 inches at the same time I got her weighed, so right around there! She was in the 75th percentile I believe, so pretty tall too!
Sleep: She is an awesome nighttime sleeper. For a good chunk of the last month she was on an awesome schedule. We'd start her nighttime routine around 6:30, and she'd be down for the night by 7:30. She typically slept 12 hour stretches waking up between 7-8 AM. The past week or so she's been staying up until at least 9 every night, and sometimes 10. I'm comfortable with her staying up as late as she wants (within reason), as long as she's happy. Even with going to bed later she is still sleeping roughly 12 hours, although a few times it's only been 10. But that's still awesome! Naps have gotten a lot better too. For awhile, she would only nap on the boob or in a carrier, and on the off chance she stayed asleep when you laid her down, it would only be for MAYBE half an hour. But lately we've been getting two good 1.5 hour naps each day, occasionally even a 3 hour one! I think we owe most of the good nap-taking to her finally finding her thumb. When she does wake up, she usually puts herself right back to sleep!
Clothing Size: 12 months! She still fits in some 9 months stuff, but they're pretty hard to get on and off. I even had her in a size 18 month dress the other day, and it fit!
Diaper Size: She hardly ever wears disposables, but when she does she wears a size 4!
Nicknames: Fia, FiaBear, Pia, PiaPia, Chunk-A-Munk, Babygirl, Monkey, and HoneyBear.
Teething: This hasn't been too rough of a month. She had the sniffles for a few days and I believe that was teething related but otherwise it doesn't seem like too much is going on there.
Milestones: She started rolling from back to tummy this month, and once she figured out she could do it she was a rolling machine. Changing her diaper feels impossible at times because the minute you lay her down she flips on her side to roll over. She also started sitting up unsupported this month. She can sit up on her own for several minutes, if she wants to. If she's tired, forget it. But most of the time she really enjoys it and will sit up playing with her toys for a good little bit. We also introduced solids this month, and she's really enjoying them! She's just starting to really bite and chew and is constantly trying to eat any food we have.
Likes: Food, keys, all her teethers and toys, her jumperoo, her bouncy chair, her Cabbage Patch baby doll, her highchair, daddy, nursing, going out (anywhere!), baths (especially eating the washcloths), and the dogs.
Dislikes: Her car seat, strangers, having her diaper changed, having something taken away from her, loud noises, standing still for too long, having her clothes changed, getting dressed after bath time, and not being able to see momma.
Random Notes: Overall this has been a pretty good month. Learning to play with toys and finding her thumb has IMMENSELY curbed her insatiable need to constantly be moving. She's gotten more content going on car rides, but still doesn't love them by any means. She's started falling asleep in the car lately though, which is awesome, even if she does wake up when we go to get her out. I'll take anything over her being super upset. I've been having so much fun with this little girl lately. I love that I get to hang out with her all day everyday. I still have yet to leave her with anyone other than Steve, but to be honest, there's no reason I NEED to. I know when the time comes, it'll be harder for me than it will be for her.
8.30.2013
A Little About Us
Hi there!
My name is Samantha. I'm 22-years-old and live in Columbus, OH. I'm in a relationship with an incredible man named Steve, who supports every venture I embark on and lets my spirit run as wild as it can.
We have a beautiful daughter together, born on April 5th of this year, named Sophia Marie. That little girl is our world and I can't even remember what I did before her.
We also have two crazy dogs, who are just as important members of the family. Riley is a 3-year-old puggle, who rules the roost around here, and Mackenzie is a 3-year-old lab/husky/setter mix who has more energy than she would ever know what to do with, but just as big of a heart as well.
My name is Samantha. I'm 22-years-old and live in Columbus, OH. I'm in a relationship with an incredible man named Steve, who supports every venture I embark on and lets my spirit run as wild as it can.
We have a beautiful daughter together, born on April 5th of this year, named Sophia Marie. That little girl is our world and I can't even remember what I did before her.
We also have two crazy dogs, who are just as important members of the family. Riley is a 3-year-old puggle, who rules the roost around here, and Mackenzie is a 3-year-old lab/husky/setter mix who has more energy than she would ever know what to do with, but just as big of a heart as well.
I've had the idea for this blog for a good bit, but it's just now coming to fruition. I love meeting and talking with other moms, particularly about things natural parenting-esque (and especially cloth diapers!). I hope to use this blog as a means of sharing my journey as I navigate the roads of crunchy motherhood. We are each others best teachers, and I look forward to contributing as much as I can.
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